The Bible NETWork ~ Impacting the World for Christ one post at a time!

What is a Christian relationship vs a Non Christian relationship when it comes to dating?

I am not sure exactly what you are refering to Chaney, however as a punt

Rather than viewing the differences of a Christian Vs Non Christian which is too broard, reason being is a "Non Christian" may have similar ethics and morals etc.

2 Corinthians 6:14 (ASV)
Be not unequally yoked with unbelievers: for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? or what communion hath light with darkness?

This scripture tells us not to be in a relationship with a non believer, I would assume one of the big reasons would be the conflict that would arise not only from varying ethics and practices etc but the difficulty to bond spiritually. In the start of a relationship there is often more tolerance than what maybe found down the track. For example a husband/wife may become quite oppositional to their partner going to bible study once a week and church on Sunday. Tithing could become an issue and so on, how could the couple share spiritually? at some point the Non Christian would most likely resent the Chrisian Ideals and visa versa.

I am really not sure if this even touches the question?

_________________
http://christianfindings.wordpress.com/
http://www.housechurchbrisbane.com/
Favourite verse John 7:37-39

Mainly i am wondering what is acceptable.... cohabitation, nudity things of that nature, and how God wants us to conduct our relationships when looking for a husband/wife.

There's been many studies on what can be interpreted regarding sexual immorality (one of many sins). In Leviticus 20, God outlines sins such as adultery, incest, bestiality and homosexual acts as sexual immorality. Since it appears we're talking directly to adultery, I think it important to define that.

Undoubtedly, there's a struggle to honor God in any relationship at times, whether it be from our inner desires or the need to humbly choose to obey, rather than choose sin over Him. Our lives are a daily battle to honor God and those battles do not come without wounds or pains. I guess the best way to answer your question is, "Will God be pleased by my actions; will this decision honor God?"

_________________
"I have been driven many times to my knees by the overwhelming conviction that I had no where else to go. My own wisdom, and that of all about me, seemed insufficient for the day." ~Abraham Lincoln

Is it Biblicly acceptable to be nude in the presence of some one (of the opposite gender) who your are not married to, to kiss or sleep next to each other (not intimately). How can we help control temptations to be intimate or have lustful thoughts, and if we have them what should we do to help it not happen again?

Chaney then I guess you maybe looking more for something like this; Mat 19:5 and said, 'FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH'?
Mat 19:6 "So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate."


The above verses are refering to marriage, and what God looks for in a relatiohship; committment by marriage is also a testimony to others of your committment before God in your relationship.

The Apostle Paul had this to say 1Co 7:9 But if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

Just in case the picture is not clear there, once "sex" becomes part of a relationship that is a committment to a Christian due to the "two becomming one"

1Co 6:16 Or do you not know that the one who joins himself to a prostitute is one body with her? For He says, "THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH." This verse alone shows how strongly God views having sex

I guess a Non Christian however is not bound as they have not been redeemed from sin at that point. I would strongly suggest you speak with your Pastor or Minister if you are in a situation or about to enter one.

_________________
http://christianfindings.wordpress.com/
http://www.housechurchbrisbane.com/
Favourite verse John 7:37-39

I think your own question answers that one, eg "How can we control temtations"; placing yourself in a volunerable situation would lead you to temptation

Do we not pray "Dear Lord do not lead us into temptation but deliver us from evil"?

I think it might be advisable that you speak with a Mature Christian someone you can trust, or your pastor or minister as discussed earlier if this is a situation you are in yourself.

_________________
http://christianfindings.wordpress.com/
http://www.housechurchbrisbane.com/
Favourite verse John 7:37-39

Sex and foreplay - which is the body's preparation for sex - should be reserved for marriage. It is hard - and I did some things that I should not have done until I was married in my 27th year, but intimacy without the full comittment of marriage is damaging to the participants.

It is far better if you do no more than kiss until you are married. I would also counsel young people to NEITHER hasten nor delay marriage. Both actions can cause problems.

God help you find the right person and keep your priorities in order.

John

_________________
"The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love." Gal 5:6b

Pastor John C. Blackburn

"It is far better if you do no more than kiss until you are married. I would also counsel young people to NEITHER hasten nor delay marriage. Both actions can cause problems."

Couldnt agree more, thus the reason it was mentioned to seek councel by someone mature in the faith and I guess someone whom would not be too judgemental, but provide good spiritual guidance.

_________________
http://christianfindings.wordpress.com/
http://www.housechurchbrisbane.com/
Favourite verse John 7:37-39

I spoke with one of my pastors and this is what he said via email...

I understand the frustration because of the sudden change but we do have to become people that leave behind the old ways and become new as Romans says by transforming your mind. I know this is your heart. Here are some verses from the Message Bible that might help you to lay some ground rules.

Ephesians 5:3 "Don't allow love to turn into lust, setting off a downhill slide into sexual promiscuity."

Collossians 3:3 "Your old life is dead. Your new life, which is your real life-even though invisible to spectators-is with Christ in God. He is your life. When Christ (your real life, remember) shows up again on this earth, you'll show up too-the real you, the glorious you. Meanwhile, be content with obscurity, like Christ. And that means killing off everything connected with that way of death: sexual promiscuity, impurity, lust, doing whatever you feel like whenever you feel like it, and grabbing whatever attracts your fancy. That's a life shaped by things and feelings instead of by God. It's because of this kind of thing that God is about to explode in anger. It wasn't long ago that you were doing all that stuff and not knowing any better. But you know better now, so make sure it's all gone for good . . ."

That was all the Message Bible. I like it because it puts the word in plain as day talk.

1 Thessalonians 4:3- "Keep yourselves from sexual promiscuity. Learn to appreciate and give dignity to your body, not abusing it, as is so common among those who know nothing of God."

This is just a few verses on it. I would say that if you are participating in lustful situations or situations where you are sharing yourself intimately with another then you are giving intimate parts of your life to someone other than the one who bought you with a price. You and God have entered into a covenant relationship with your salvation. This gives you and God a boldness to be intimate with one another in Spirit and truth. If You are not in covenant relationship (marriage) with them you should not give your body over to him. As far as showering together, laying naked together, or participating in any other areas of intimate affection I would ask myself if that situation causes you or another to lust after sexual relations with one another. As you can see from the verses above that is the key. You can kiss, hold hands, but try to stay out of situations that will tempt you to give away the intimate parts of yourself. I hope this helps! It is truly a struggle for anyone in your position. Even if both parties are Christians and did not want to participate in any premarital affairs it would still be difficult. You will have to work even harder because you are coming from a relationship where that was ok and now it isn't. All of the "rules" that God gives us is to protect us from ourselves and from getting caught up in the things that will take our focus off of Him and keep us from accomplishing the greatness He has for us.

chaneymc Looks a good and informative response to me but more importantly, how do you see the response? The answers have been put before you I guess it is up to you how you act on them, no one can make the decsion for you and I am sure you realise that.

I do hope you make the correct one, and will support you in Prayer, I hope others in the forum do the same and sure they will.

_________________
http://christianfindings.wordpress.com/
http://www.housechurchbrisbane.com/
Favourite verse John 7:37-39

chaneymc

that is good advice from your pastor .....

The advice I gave my daughter when she asked what she could and couldn't do was this :

"Don't do anything you would not be happy doing with Jesus beside you. Because of course He is, and you just have to keep this always in your mind."

In marriage it is different .... then the One who created Adam and Eve for intimacy gives you His blessing.

You cannot pray "lead us not into temptation", when you do not take care not to put yourself into a situation where control becomes impossible for you.

in Christ

Dinah

_________________
Forum Code of Conduct
Forum Statement of Beliefs

chaneymc:

Umm...I'm not sure why you are asking a question to which there is such an obvious answer.

(Unless you are someone who 'disagrees' with bikinis, and then calls wearing a bikini 'nudity' and then says the Bible specifically criticizes bikinis, or something. But I'm not sure that you're advancing that sort of argument...I'm not really sure what you're saying.)

_________________
Read the Bible prayerfully.For a wealth of sound theology, go to John 3:16.
(My wife and I are very much in love, by the way.)
I don't like extremes of temperature. I don't like extremes among preachers. People maybe think I'm extreme.But never mind about me
A true Christian is different, and the world will notice the difference.Even your tattoo, if it's faith related, it's different!

I think you have to figure out what your own personal boundary is. You have to determine what makes you feel out of control. It's different for everyone, and you have to decide for yourself where that line is. Make sure you and your girlfriend have open conversations about these boundaries and are very honest and straightforward with each other. It's always easier when both parties are on the same page.

D:

I think if chaneymc had defined 'nude', it would have been clearer what exactly he meant.

_________________
Read the Bible prayerfully.For a wealth of sound theology, go to John 3:16.
(My wife and I are very much in love, by the way.)
I don't like extremes of temperature. I don't like extremes among preachers. People maybe think I'm extreme.But never mind about me
A true Christian is different, and the world will notice the difference.Even your tattoo, if it's faith related, it's different!