"Present your wife holy and blameless before Christ."
One day we are going to stand in front of Christ and we will be judged for the things that we did on earth. Of course, we are accepted into heaven based on our faith but we are judged a second time according to our obedience to Christ. Part of that obedience the bible talks about is how well we did as stewards with the people and things God entrusted to us while on earth.
So what is our role in presenting her holy and blameless before Christ? Let's think about how Jesus treated His disciples while on earth:
1) He loved them
2) He provided for them
3) He cared for them
4) He modeled for them
In the same way we should do the same for our wives.
Love her by being gentle in your tone. This may seem like common sense but for some people that grew up in a home where parents yelled at each other, this may be difficult not to do. My wife and I used to argue allot (mostly my fault). Eventually I would start to get angry and would start to yell. This would really crush my wife's spirit. It took me a while to realize this but when I did learn that I was really hurting her I knew this was something I had to control no matter what it took.
Being a man is not shooting guns, bench pressing and conquering women. Being a real man is acting like the ultimate manly man, Jesus Christ, who loved us and sacrificed so much for us that He even gave up His right to live.
Philipians 2:5-8 "Have this mind in you, which was also in Christ Jesus:6 who, existing in the form of God, counted not the being on an equality with God a thing to be grasped,7 but emptied himself, taking the form of a servant, being made in the likeness of men;8 and being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, becoming obedient even unto death, even the death of the cross."
Provide For Her
Provide for her by not only working hard to bring home the money but also provide the things that she needs to be her best. Provide a clean car, storage space around the house (my wife always wants more shelves!), if she loves music give her speakers in every room she spends allot of time in to plug in her iPhone. Provide her with a computer if she loves to write. Provide a loving environment where she can talk about anything without fear of being judged.
Care for Her
Care for her by telling her the things she needs to here. Our voices are deep and rich. God made woman crave this authority and boldness. We can rip our wife's heart to shred with a few flippant words or we can revive her soul by telling her who she is as a child of God.
Recently my wife went to the dentist for a cleaning. She was very worried because every time she has gone to the dentist lately she has had problems; over 9 cavities, a root canal, crowns all with the past 2 years. As they talked with Brittany, she found out that she has been trying to get pregnant for the past ten years. Melissa really related because we have struggled for a few years trying to get pregnant. Eventually her thoughts turned back to herself however but she felt bad for worrying about what she thought was having a couple more cavities. She pushed down those thoughts and didn't allow herself to feel them.
When she came home and told me how the visit went. She was embarrassed that she was concerned about cavities when her hygienist was going through so much more. I looked at her and told her "Well I'm not so sure that having cavities is any less of a concern then a barren womb. It's tough to have your body fall apart on you a little bit and you were scared there would be more cavities and that is hard to deal with."
I went to work and didn't think anything about what I said. But a couple hours later I got a text from her that said "So I was just thinking about how much your are changing and how so much of that change is natural. Like when you said this morning that my dental problems were just as painful as a barren womb, you were truly speaking from your heart. Not cause you thought it would be the right thing to say but because you really cared. When you treat me like that, it has so much healing power and fills me with love".
So now do you think my wife was able to fight her own battles well that day? God spoke to her through me and God wants to speak to your wife today through you. Learn how to hear God's voice and you will be able to do the work of God. How exciting is that? If you are bored with your life, stuck in a rut, or feel trapped in sin, then man up, put on the armor of God and join the fun.
Model for Your Wife (and your family)
This really is for both the husband and the wife to do for each other. There are not as many "Models" of behavior as there used to be. Up until the 1900's every girl and boy, from a fairly early age, was in a state of apprenticeship for a particular skill. They were not only taught principles of life but they were assigned to an older person so that they could also be shown how to perform a particular skill.
We need to show our family how to respond to criticism, how to react to power hungry police officers, how to respond when someone cuts us off in traffic, how to love others through giving, prayer and fellowship. We to are called to model for our wife and children. If we live our lives knowing the Spirit is alive inside us then we will conduct ourself in a way that reflects that.
I just read the bible everyday for the past 70 days for about an hour to an hour and half , I finished it in 70 days. What do you think happened with my wife? She has been reading the bible more and more. I wasn't reading so that my wife would read more. I read because God has given me a hunger for the Word and I obeyed and this inspired her!
Be like Jesus to your wife and she will follow in your holiness and righteousness.
Link removed see COC#11. RH